...and then came the sun.

I stepped out onto the porch to see what the day looked like and almost went back inside. I could have slept all day in weather like this. The cool, morning breeze brushed my cheek and I was glad that I had out on an extra shirt. I turned the knob to 'warm' om the heater in the car and waited for the engine to warm up a bit before backing out.

As I arrived at the hotel where Jack lives I saw the differences in the construction signs. The streets around the hotel have been torn up f0or months and will be for even longer but I could see progress none the less and was happy that there had been at least a couple of minor completions.

Why does the construction of roads seem to take so much time? There must be a better way to get things done, but I'm not going to change jobs. That would mean even more time to get something done. I wouldn't make a very good 'road worker'. They have to put up with a lot and I don't think that I'm cut out for that type of torture; at least not at this stage of the game.

I got an email from my friend in Colorado. They got snow. Here it is May and they still get snow.

How wonderful it must be to wake up every morning and look out on the majesty of the Spanish Peaks. Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. I can hardly wait to get there when we go and I hate to leave when it's time to come home. The mere thought of moving there is such a real temptation I don't think that I could stop myself if I got the chance. Of course there are many things to consider about making that choice, but I would truly love it.

I'm looking ahead to next weekend. I'll be in church watching all the mothers line up across the front and wonder just what my little "grannie" is doing right about then. She's not getting any younger and I seem to miss her more each week as time goes on. We never have been close in regards to distance but we have been close in the spirit for many years. Her life has been quite unusual in many ways and simple in others, but I know how she loves her mountains and ha finally gotten to go back to them once again. I'll make every effort to go see her this summer. There may not be many more of them for her so I certainly want to make sure I am included in what goes on around her from now on.

Isn't it funny how we see things 'speed up' as we get older?

...like waking the rocks

I was aroused from a deep sleep by the wonderful sensation of a warm hand stroking my arm.Dianna had heard my alarm and I hadn't.
The day before was finally over at 11:45 PM that night and seemingly went on for days. Having begun at the usual 7:45 Am that morning, I ended up standing on my feet for well over hours before leaving the mall at 7 PM. As I mentioned in my other post, the tornado alarm put an early end to my watch at Shawnee Mall.
I hadn't sold anything anyway, so it became a good excuse to stop the torment and 'call it a day'.
And so, even as I slowly climbed out of bed this morning I thought how nice it would be to see 9 PM roll around and signal my release.
Unfortuneately it's only now a little past 5 PM and my feet are pleading to be removed. I don't see how people do this on a regular basis. The tile floor just simply tears me up.
My favorite pasttime of watching people and their strange habits has only been heighteneed since beginning this adventure with Jack in the mall. More and more I think, "how dumb are some of these people, really?"
For instance, the machine right next to me is a favorite stopping place for the dumbest of the dumb. For some unknown reason they continue to feed coin after coin into the slot, all the while knowing that the machine isn't going to give up that little rubber ball even if they do get it to lodge itself in the grabbing tool. Everytime it picks up a ball it shakes as the arm is about halfway up and releases the 'prize', letting it tumble back into the loose pile of slightly under inflated balls. The thing has 'gimmick' all but written in bold red letters across the front of the case. We've been here the better part of a month and I have yet to see anyone get a ball to come out the shoot.
Enough sarcasm, I'm starting to sound like Siscall & Ebert.
I do know one thing; if a person wants to learn about human characteristics all they have to do is come to the mall and sit and watch.
The things you will learn will amaze you.

...time to go

The sound of the tornado siren suddenly overshadowed the usual crowd noises inside the mall. I turned toward the door and saw a large group of people heading in my direction fromn outsie. They too had heard the ominous sound and were heading for the closest storm shelter inside. This was my first tornado siren experience indoors at a mall. I immediately noticed the looks on the faces opf the people swarming toward me. They all had the 'deer in the headlights' expression and were waiting for the mall security to direct them on into the shelter.
One of the vendors motioned to me as she listened intentlty to her cell phone. I walked that way and overheard her say, "oh, that's good... it won't be here for another 30 minutes then... uh, okay, I'll call you back later and let you know."
"It won't be here for..."
"Yeah, I heard you on the phone just now", I said in reply. "That's good, I think I'll lock up and head on to the house from here. I don't like being couped up with a bunch of people that I don't know so I think I'll pass on going to the shelter."
"Okay, I think I'll wait around here for a little while. They always give the all clear over the loud speakers as soon as they hear from the police department that everything is safe again. I've been to the shelter before. It gets crowded in there and no one listens. They all try to talk at the same time and ..... You know something, I think I'll close up early too. I haven't had a day off in 6 weeks. This will work for a little break from all the hussle and bustle and I can watch the news at the house."
"I think you've got the right idea", I said smiling back at her. Jack and I had both commented on her strong work ethic. We had spent a lot of time there a week or so ago and I watched her steadily at it day after day and thought to myself what a hard worker she is.
"Take care, I'll see you tomorrow."
"You too", I answered as I walked away.
I drove the 35 miles back to the city and watched the clouds get farther and farther away. By the time I reached the Air Force Base the sky was almost completely clear. I had hoped for a rainstorm but it looked to be a bleak possibility at that point. Maybe another day. All the rain had traveled Eastbound. The chances may go up later on tonight. We desperately need the moisture. The grassfires have been terrible. Someone mentioned the Dust Bowl days theother day. I wondered how long the rain would hold off and just how bad it might get before we do get rain.

...clip, clip, clip

The sound of the tires on the pavement gave me the impression of someone tap dancing along beside me.
I drove into town this morning and looked around me with 'new eyes'. I hadn't really taken the time to look at the skyline for awhile and as I did I noticed a vast difference in the outline of the buildings downtown. The new Devon building is really something. Someone told me that it will be over 50 stories when it is complete and the exterior is all glass. It stands like a shining sentinel in the bright sun.I instantly thought if the old saying about 'throwing stones' and' living in a glass house'.
The weather has begun to feel a lot more Spring like of late. The winds have created a real problem for the firefighters. They are having an awful time keeping up with the grass fires. My son got a face full of smoke and debris from a flareup and had to have a breathing treatment from all the smoke. I worry about him being so brave sometimes. He doesn't think of himself at all. He plunges headlong into the fray and doesn't let up until all the smoldering embers are under control. It makes me proud to know that I know him. He's such a good son.
His mother might be a little proud of him too, but I don't mention that in front of many people when she's along. It always sparks a long dialogue about his history and how he worked his way up from nothing to where he is now and on and on. I don't mind, it's just that I've heard it a thousand times and after the 800th time it gets a little dry, even if I am the Dad.
I'll be putting up another Blog soon.
My new boss has finally agreed to start one on our new website. We will work together on it, which I look forward to, and we will endeavor to create something everyone will not only enjoy but learn something from as well.
As an update, the new job is staggering. I am so far behind on the new website it isn't funny. I only take beaks like this one ever so often to let my brain 'cool down'. This will be a 'killer site' though. I will have used all the knowledge I have at my disposal to date, to bring about the finished build. I am so anxious to see what it will produce. It could mean the future of our company and what I will ultimately do on other sites. I am so stoked! (As if you couldn't tell.)
I'll write more on this in the coming days, but for now, I need all the prayers I can get so thanks in advance for yours.

...what I find

I listened intently on the phone as the news came. I was taken back a bit but undeterred none the less. Things like this have a way of creating havoc if you let them and I wasn't going to be the one to tip over the apple cart, not at this particular time.

I know, I haven't said what the news was all about and I'm not going to either. It is better left unsaid at this point so that the testimony later can be even more significant. What I can say ids that I see God's hand on us all and it seems ever so enlightening that something of this nature can and should arise. Whom do I trust; God or man? I choose God. It's the best answer and it always works. Man is too unsteady and unpredictable to rely on. My own past is a testament to that scenario and bears watching all the more as this set of events unfolds and shows us what God has in store.

I only want what he wants. It's the only way to live, especially at this time in history. What with the world groaning and shaking and convulsing like it is, man doing anything and everything he can to add to the destruction with faulty concepts and ideas that seldom pan out to be anything more than conjecture and ignorance that seems more and more rampant; I pause to marvel at our stupidity sometimes. How is it that we don't learn from our history with all of its glaring mistakes and missteps? You would think that we would be much wiser than we are, but we're not. People are still falling for the same age old contrivances they have fallen for for centuries. The games just get a new coat of paint and a new name and still people go for the wrong things time after time. It's amazing really how gullible we are as a people.

I keep hearing about this and that genius and how smart some people are, but then I hear how someone has been taken in a scam and they wonder how could somebody do them the way they did them. It's almost laughable when you get right down to it. We set ourselves up for failure by not seeking the face of God in what we do. The Bible plainly says, "our ways are not his ways and his wisdom is far above our wisdom". Why wouldn't a relatively smart person use that great wisdom to succeed? But no, we have do things "our way", we have to be the one to decide who, what and why and yet we still keep falling on our faces in the mud of life and wonder what went wrong... every time.

I know, I know, 'get off your soapbox, John', you're no better than the rest of us; and its true. I fall for the same lines over and over and wonder why I did it ... "again".

Alright, I 'm done. I'll stop griping and get back to work. I feel all better now and I'm putting on my 'big boy pants' and going on my merry way. I love it though, this wonderful world we live in. There are so many stories out there that totally fascinate me and capture my attention day after day as I watch what people do and say. There is no better programming; not on television, radio or at the movies. people will always surpass the writer's imaginations and act or react to what happens to them in marvelous, heart wrenching ways that grab you by the throat and choke all of the emotion right out of you in an instant. I certainly hope that I never go "blind".

...happy birthday to me!

The end of the song always reminds me of watching a child blow out his or her candles.

It doesn't seem to matter how old I get, I still enjoy my birthday week. Di always gets me a present for each day of the week and I look forward to every little nuance of 'the dance' as she anticipates when I will arrive and has a special package waiting for me as I come in the door.

I wonder how many people don't have a happy birthday? There must be millions. How sad to think that they won't be seeing the love in someone's eyes as they hand you that gift and wait to see your expression at receiving something tat means so much in whatever form.

Today finds me with Jack in Shawnee working the mall again. We have been disappointed at the response and the traffic. It should be a great deal more but its not. I wonder what God has in store for us in the next few weeks. We are waiting on important news that will determine a lot of our success in the coming days and I look for it to be a catalyst of sorts in setting things in motion that will lead to better and better circumstances for everyone concerned.

Thee are exciting times even though they are stressful and create a lot of questions in my mind.

I know God knows the answers; I just have to be patient and trust him through to the finish.

... a simple truth

How often do you wonder if someone is really telling you the truth?

I have a wonderful grandson that we have invested hours and days and weeks teaching, nurturing and praying for and with. The other day we got a report that he is failing in school. He has been telling us that 'everything is alright' on all fronts and we find out that it's not. He's failing in everything but Music.

He is supposed to graduate in May and go on to college to further his education in music but at this point I see no college in his future at all. He can only go if he gets some sort of scholarship. He is a very gifted cellist and guitar player but for whatever reason he has let down in the past few months and doesn't have the slightest interest in being active in anything other than his music. Even at that, I wonder how much he cares about that because he seldom practices.

His siblings are both self starters and it's difficult keeping up with them at times even though we are pretty 'hip' if you will excuse the use of such an archaic term.

What to do? It seems only right that he should 'carry his weight' around the house as do the others but it doesn't seem to occur to him that these things are important or even relevant.

Having been on my own since about the age of 15, I have always been a self starter and motivated to 'get into the action' at every opportunity, but not him. He would rather sleep late, not bathe, eat whatever is left over in the fridge instead of cook, wear last weeks clothes because he likes them( that day) and seldom participates with others in group activities.

I'm at a loss for words here. I would like to know a way to reach him and hopefully see 'the lights come on' in that head of his, so that he realizes how much he's missing. At 18, I was a Lance Corporal in the Marine Corps driving an Admiral around the base in Gitmo, (Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, 1967).

Someone, please, help me out here. I'm open for any and all suggestions, possible solutions or crazy ideas of any sort. I've been around homeless and low income people since 1987 and I see this in almost every one of them to some degree or another. Motivation is sorely lacking.

What to do?